It's the Thought that Counts

I'm no Carrie Bradshaw. It is not my job to write about my single life. Nor am I waif thin with an endless budget for designer shoes. My point is, void of writing deadlines, I rarely do write :) But today I feel inspired. And no, not because I joined the masses of romantics reading Hope Pray Love and envying an unrealistic existance. I'm inspired because I am surrounded by real woman with real problems who have no clue how to begin to solve them or the time and energy if they did.

Yes, I know that isn't an out pour of enthusiasm, but it's REAL! Remember real Ladies?

I am single and beginning to actually feel almost blissful about it. My friends are either married or shacked up and they hate their husbands/boyfriends most of the time. They have more man problems with one man than I would dating an entire basketball team. The essential message: Men are not the train to happiness! I mean sure...they can help make pretty babies, pick up milk, be decent fathers, be a dinner partner. But in the end, we are on our own ladies. We work jobs (yes, the plural is intential), raise children, pay mortages and rent, grocery shop, attempt to "keep ourselves up" and keep charity alive. I have yet to date a man who really betters my life except for an occassional orgasm and someone to discuss a movie or televsion with. I do not know a single woman in my life who is truely happy with her monogomy. (Well, maybe one, but I'm not even sure how real that is...you know who you are!)

I know this sounds like I'm hating on men. But I'm not. I like men. I like to talk shit, drink a beer, roll in the hay. I like the simplicity of the conversation, the jesting, the way they feel. They serve a purpose. I recognize. But at the end of the day, it is up to me to connect to the universe, keep my life in order, and to take pleasure in the small things that lead to happiness. I guess the question isn't which man will take you to happiness, but which man can you stand to be on the train ride with, without wanting to throw him off every mile?

I have had an epiphany. I want to remain single. Forever. I'm not saying I won't love or connect. Because despite my ramblings, I still believe in Love. I just don't think love means having to share a bed every night, or coming home to a lathargic man! And I don't think love means just giving yourself to one person. And the more I talk to other women, I wonder why we even try? It takes four men to even begin to be a complete person! It's not their fault. It's just the way they are built.

I am larger than life. I can work and take care of at-risk kid's needs all day. I can come home at night and write curriculum that helps teachers be better teachers. I can give an ear and hand to my friends, clean my house, pay my bills (usually, on time), and if ever given the blessing, raise a child. And I am 100 percent sure I can do this without being bound to a man. Why do I know this? I look around and see most women doing it every single day. No wonder we are such complex creatures. We have to be in order to balance a heavy plate.

Lynn's law: I am woman and you aren't worth roaring at!